You’re tearing me apart, Hooper!
Worst shark film ever? For some it’s Jaws the Revenge, others Sharknado et al, but for many surely it has to be the shark shit fest that is the John Barrowman starring Shark Attack 3: Megalodon.
That ‘terrible classic’ may be about to be toppled from the very, um, bottom of the shark film pile by the news of a new killer shark kid on the block, Big Shark.
So what makes this just announced film so special? It’s written by, directed by and stars Tommy Wiseau, who also wrote and directed the citizen Kane of bad films, The Room. Perhaps his latest should be called Jaws The Room-venge then?
Here’s the trailer for that infamous film debut:
The Room is a film so bad that not only has it gained cult status and regularly has special screenings, but also had a film, The Disaster Artist; made about its making - which ended up being nominated for an Oscar, go figure.
With three firemen from New Orleans trying to save the world – from the Big Shark of the title we imagine – does that make this The Disaster Movie Artist?
I don’t know about you but we’ve about had enough of intentionally bad shark capers and was hoping that dorsal fin had sailed - we’d say cinematic shark fin - but let’s face it they are far from it. This is less the shark still isn’t working and more the shark was never designed to work properly in the first place.
Yeah, but they are fun with a beer and some mates you might say. That may be perverse but true, although each intentionally inferior shark film just shoots another yellow barrel into Bruce. It will never stop him, but it doesn’t do the future of shark films any favours.
That’s especially disappointing as - although not perfect - we’ve seen resurgence of late in the effective shark thriller in everything from The Shallows, 47 Meters Down and - big budget shark poster boy - The Meg.
Like them or not it was nice to see money and time spent on effects or story - something not always forthcoming in the others. I’m sure Big Shark will be no different. No footage actually exists yet, although we here it is scheduled for release this September.
There is however a promotional teaser about the film that has leaked online here, it’s not very good footage or er not very good footage.
Any shark film keeps the interest in sharks and Jaws alive for a potential new audience; we don’t just want any shark film though. We want good ones. Whatever the fate of Giant Shark, we all know that Jaws will remain top of the cinematic shark food chain.
What do you think big thumbs up or big thumbs down for Big Shark?
By Dean Newman
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